Have you ever been consumed by an over-whelming desire to pick up your computer and hurl it at a fast-moving train? Of course you have. Everyone has. Slow computers irritate all of us.

The only things stopping you from doing it are the facts that you would have to travel a very big distance (and wait a few days) to find a train and when you eventually do, it would be moving slow enough for you to type out an email to a friend in Hong Kong, think about hitting send, re-consider, choose to use snail mail, walk to the post office, write a letter, send it and then wait for a response at the post office. When you finally get a response from your friend, the train would have reached the computer you intended for it to murder.

According to research done by a world-leading research company that was set-up at the same time as Apple, 90 per cent of computer users around the world feel the urge to crush their machines with their bare hands. 3 per cent would rather use their pens. Three per cent would want to use their fork at lunch time. The other four per cent are still looking for the ON button.

As a side note, the research company mentioned above was setup by Sloppy Jobs, older brother to Jobs, the one who founded Apple. Sloppy was not too good a businessman and his research findings were discredited by many research firms.

So, back to the angst-inspiring computer you spend many a waking day at, what do you do when this urge hits? Do you pick up the phone and call the guy from I.T? Is he not out for lunch?
As another side note, leading research from the same company mentioned above shows that I.T personnel are at lunch 76 per cent of their working day. The company goes on to detail what I.T personnel have for lunch but there is not enough space to go into that.

So when having trouble with your machine and the guy from I.T is out, what do you do? The answer to all your computer problems is simple…wait, we have run out of space and we cannot exactly use that strip that David Tumusiime uses for Taxi tales up there; he has another tale today it turns out. We dive deeper into your computer issue next week.

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